Sunday, January 15, 2006

You might like to know . . .

(Hat tip: Watermark)
I have been wondering whether to tell my reader(s) these things for some time now. But you know how the Internets are; word gets out. So, what follows is a list of things that you most likely would have found out about me anyway.

Besides: I feel confident now that you like me for me.

Ten Top Trivia Tips about John B.!

  1. If you toss John B. 10000 times, he will not land heads 5000 times, but more like 4950, because his head weighs more and thus ends up on the bottom.

  2. The Church of Scientology was founded in 1953, at Washington D.C., by John B.!

  3. Early thermometers were filled with John B. instead of mercury!

  4. In the kingdom of Bhutan, all citizens officially become John B. on New Year's Day.

  5. John B. was banned from Finland because of not wearing pants.

  6. A lump of John B. the size of a matchbox can be flattened into a sheet the size of a tennis court!

  7. In Ancient Egypt, people wore glittery eyeshadow made from the crushed shells of John B.!

  8. John B. can live for up to a week without a head.

  9. The average human spends about 30 days during their life in John B.!

  10. New Zealand was the first place to allow John B. to vote.

I am interested in - do tell me about

I have done further, extensive research on my readership and have posted the results on my Frapprmap. The careful reader will note that s/he actually has a few things in common with me.

Surely that thing in Finland has blown over by now--statute of limitations and all.


R. Sherman said...

UT looked very good yesterday.


John B. said...

They did indeed. That victory bodes well for the remainder of the season.

Sine.Qua.Non said...

This is hilarious John and that tool is really nifty!

René López Villamar said...

>>Originally, Blog Meridian readers could not fly.

..because they were lobsters; also, it is good to know that I'm low-calorie.

I had a good laugh with this. Thanks, John.

mannequinhands said...

I am relatively certain that I have not yet spent one day in John B.

Does this mean I have 30 days of time spent in John B. to look forward to in my lifetime?


John B. said...

I am relatively certain that I have not yet spent one day in John B.

Many, MANY people have not, Erin, to their unspeakable, if unknowable, loss. If this blog can, however humbly and imperfectly, make them aware of the empty, ignorant lives they have so far been leading, well then, my work here will not have been in vain.