Thursday, September 20, 2007

Talk Like a Pirate post-mortem

It seems to come earlier and earlier every year . . .

I was remiss in not reminding and encouraging my reader(s) of the 19th--I've been quite busy for the past few days grading student writing ("Arrrgh! Th' freshness of yer prose fills me head like th' salt-air when I stand on th' bow, the ship under full sail !" "Avast! Revise this scurvy mess you call writing!") and, yes, I confess it, making up some talk-like-a-pirate jokes to try out on students and colleagues--like this one (my best one, just to give you a sense of the quality of said jokes), inspired by the all-O.J.-all-the-time mode Fox News (alas, the news network of choice where I work) has gone into:

Q: "What's a pirate lawyer's favorite court proceeding?"
A: "Arrrgh-raignment!"

(That one's yours, Randall and Belle--no need to thank me.)

Someone asked me where my eyepatch was, which I frankly hadn't considered--props I mean. The inherent charm of International Talk Like a Pirate Day is that it is in its essence a come-as-you-arrrrgh! (get it?) affair. No worries about secularizing or commercializing it; no concerns about offending non-adherents (though, as I found, they'll laugh at you more than with you); no shopping; no having to clean up after the guests leave; no wondering why the heck we kill ourselves worrying about whose family we'll visit this time around. But maybe it's not a "real" holiday, then: maybe holidays should create at least a little existential tension in the celebrants to get them to, you know, think about not just what is being observed but also why.

But, you know, there are times when I could do with a bit less existential tension in my life; I think that's true of most of us. TLAPD more than fills the bilge--er, the bill.

Anyway: I hope TLAPD didn't sneak up on your stern this year the way it almost did me. Feel free to use the comments section to tell the world how you celebrated this year (or, alternately, to promise that you will next year).

6 comments:

R. Sherman said...

Of course, for those of us who are members of the bar, every day is "Talk Like A Pirate Day."

Cheers.

Winston said...

Aaaaarrrggghhh... It got by me, matey. I'll wager a piece o' eight that it 'appens again next year.

John B. said...

Thanks for commenting on a silly post.

I had great fun with the office staff on that day; I have to walk by their space on the way to class, and as I did, I'd give 'em a hearty "Arrrgh!" and make up some piratesque academic talk. But yesterday, it being a bit slow, I and they somehow got into a minor verbal scuffle over the merits of Wal-Mart's business practices. After we went round and round for a bit, I finally said, "I bet y'all are glad we didn't have this conversation on Talk Like a Pirate Day."

Next year, I'll do my pirate-prepping early. I promise.

Jay Emm said...

Gawd strike me down!!! This reminds me of many decades ago at the University of Leeds {UK} We had similar TLAP weeks..not days!
I actually haunted campus toting an artificial arm complete with hook.Great fun and a legitimate distraction from Malthus.
So I'll shiver me timbers and strike up me mains'l to you. 'Jim Lad' in Canada

John B. said...

Jim,
Thanks for stopping by and commenting.

Re your college days: It's like I've always thought--the Brits know how to do things classy-like.

Sheila said...

I forgot. So I'll just make like a pirate and steal a few lines, imperfectly recalled -- these few following from John Lennon's "In His Own Write" collection:

"Where be the Parable you normally 'ave on your shoulder, Large John?" asks Blind Jew, looking up.

"Never ye mind," responds Large John. "And anyways, where be your white stick?"

"'Ow the 'ell should oi know when oi can't see?"